An Overdue Update

It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything. I had written a few drafts of things I wanted to talk about, but they never seemed good enough to post. I kept them as drafts for months, then finally deleted them. I asked myself, “what the heck is even the purpose of your blog? Why not just keep everything in a diary?” I don’t really have the answers to that question either. HOWEVER, I am going to keep writing here and at some point I will probably make this blog more niche-specific so that I’m not just drowning my readers with my life’s issues. Also, I’d like to mention that I completely hate this new WordPress post editor…

Anyway! Since my last post was about getting played, I’ll start there. I’ve completely moved on from that and I’ve actually finally managed to find someone amazing, who I’m compatible with, and enjoy spending time with. So I’m glad I had the courage and strength to drop the dead weight and not be pre-occupied when the right guy came around. The experience was still very traumatic though and I’m probably not yet in a place where I can wish Mr. Suave good luck in his life endeavors.

I am no longer going to be posting here about fitness or nutrition in general. It’s not my niche and it’s so complex for me. I am on a good track currently though! Unfortunately, it took stepping on the scale and seeing a terrifying number to kick me in the ass and make me stop making excuses for my crappy eating habits. What’s wild is that for the past 4 years, I’ve been someone who works out very often- like 6 or 7 days a week. Yet, I either gained or maintained my weight because I high key had an eating disorder that I was afraid to face. I’ve been actively choosing to no longer let my mental barriers come between me and the woman I’m meant to be. That includes shitty eating habits.

I wrote a book! I sent it to a publisher to be considered for publishing, but if it gets rejected, I will be self-publishing it online for free. I haven’t decided on how to go about that and I honestly don’t know what I’m doing, but writing is one of my favorite forms of self-expression and I’ve been writing fiction stories since I was a child. I was past due to publish something one way or another. I’m also planning to have some character and story art created by a talented Black artist before this year ends. If I self-publish it online, I’ll post a link to it here. I already picked a platform.

I’ve got quite a bit happening between now and December, so I probably won’t say much til things calm down. I’m really excited about gaining a better sense of purpose when it comes to this blog. This has been such an excellent way for me to document my journey, practice writing, and express myself. Thanks to the people who read, like, share, and even email me. I really just made this blog as a little personal thing, but I like that I’ve been able to interact with and reach people all over the globe. Keep on being awesome everyone!

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A Note to My Readers

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There are people who read my blog and that’s something that I can hardly fathom. Between a lack of confidence and a serious case of impostor syndrome, I never felt that I could create anything that would be of value to anyone else. Despite having so many reasons to believe otherwise, I still struggle to wrap my mind around someone thinking a creation of mine is worth their time.

But this is not a post about my struggles with anxiety and identity. This is simply a post to say thank you. Thank you to everyone who has read even one of my posts. Thank you to those who’ve subscribed to my blog. Thank you to each and every commentor. Thank you to everyone who’s written to me to personally let me know that they enjoy my content. I’ve contemplated giving up this blog so many times and I’m glad I’ve decided to stick around. I look forward to continuing to write and share my little 2 cents on life.

~Courtney

According to Maslow, I’m Seriously Lacking

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I was in church, prepared for the sermon, when this triangular-diagram was projected onto the big screen behind my pastor. Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. This was no concept that I was new to, but I was surprised to see it being brought up in church. As I gazed at this big pyramid in front of me, I was devastated by what I realized. Continue reading “According to Maslow, I’m Seriously Lacking”

My Mid-April Thoughts and Progress

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April is half-way done and the Spring semester is finally coming to a close. This semester was perhaps the least academically-challenging semester that I’ve had, yet it was no less stressful than any other. The deadlines for my online courses approached faster than I could keep up with, my organic chemistry laboratory professor is one of those people that finds humor in behaving like an ass, and my internship- while incredibly fulfilling, was unpaid. Lump that on top of an underpaid part-time job, eventually two underpaid part-time jobs, and you’ve got a recipe for unnecessary stress. Continue reading “My Mid-April Thoughts and Progress”

Thing’s I’ve Learned From Becoming A Substitute Teacher

It’ll be easy” they said… “It’s easy money, just sit there and watch the kids“… the lies!

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In my recent quest to keep my bills paid and food in my stomach, I’ve picked up what is essentially my third job now- on top of my 17 credit hour course load. My understanding was that this job would hardly be a job because I’ll “just” be a sub, so there’s virtually no responsibility and no strings attached. Not to mention, I get to “make my own schedule”. What’s there not to love? HA..! I think I’ll write another post tomorrow about what it’s been like so far for me as a sub, but in this post I want to talk about some valuable lessons I’ve been learning. Continue reading “Thing’s I’ve Learned From Becoming A Substitute Teacher”

October’s challenges

I’ve already seen people on social media talking about various challenges for the month of October and it’s getting me a little hyped up..! I’d really like to dive deeper into my creative abilities this fall, so an October challenge might be just the push I needed to start creating. I’m going to be on the look out for challenges that involve drawing/painting, journaling, and blogging. I had mentioned before that I wanted to give this blog a little more of a sense of direction, but I have not really done that yet. It’s been more of a diary- which is okay, but it has sort of made me contemplate how long I’ll keep it going. I am hoping to begin to write posts using prompts for topics instead of so much “off-top”, sporadic posting. I think that writing  based on prompts will force me to put more thought into my posts and hopefully spice up the creativity that I put into them too.

I took a little break

But I’m back! I have not forgotten my beloved blog, although a lack of motivation is partially what took me so long to come back! I’ve got some topics in mind that I would like to share my opinion on and I can’t wait to write these thoughts out. Not to mention, the beginning of the last stretch of this journey that I’m on is about to begin! So many things to talk about, and I’ve got the time to do it.

Stay tuned!

Taking this blog in a new direction

In 5 days this blog will be 1 year old. So much has happened in a year and I’m happy to have blogged what I have about it. I am certainly proud of this blog and starting it was a wonderful idea. Blogging has offered me the opportunity to expand on one of my many skills; writing. I’m not superb at writing and I despise English grammar, but I do enjoy it. I’m an over-thinker and writing helps me to sort out my thoughts. Continue reading “Taking this blog in a new direction”