From August of 2016 until August of 2019 I had a solid plan. I had a vision. I knew where I wanted to be and I was excited to find out what was drawing my heart there. I devoted myself to my goal as much as I knew how to. I told everyone that I was going to do it and the final months leading up to it, I started to prepare and brace myself.
Then, August of 2019 came to an end and took my dream with it. It was like watching someone take your most prized possession and tossing it into a grinding garbage disposal. I cried. I grieved. I isolated myself from everyone. I prayed. Everyone told me that I needed to just face what was in front of me; some even suggesting that my dream was never meant to come true in the first place. My heart was shattered into pieces and I didn’t trust bringing it to anyone for revival- not even God. Continue reading “Is This the Worst-Case Scenario | Life Update”
At the end of September, I posted that I was taking a short break from writing in order to focus on other things.
Other things included my upcoming graduation next month and my absolutely pointless courseload, studying Japanese, posting more content on my other platforms, improving my quality of life, acquiring a post-graduation job, and the list goes on. So much has changed and the past few months have been absolute hell. Looking back, I predicted this in my diary over the summer. I just knew that there was no way I’d get to glide my way through the finish line. So let me be transparent and catch you up. Continue reading “A Lot Has Changed”
You know, sometimes I feel like I’m doing so great. My optimism peaks at an all-time high. I eat well, go to the gym regularly, pray regularly, and I (feel like I) have a grip on my life.
Other days, I just sink into the depths of my lows. I could be eating better, working out more, praying more, waking up earlier, achieving more at work. Do I have a grip on my life? Or am I standing on the accelerator petal- headed straight for a cement wall? Continue reading “The 90-day Mark”
“So what is it that you want to do?” That’s the biggest question of 2019 for graduating seniors, isn’t it?
I started this blog 2 years ago, almost 3? My intention was to write my thoughts, plans, and activities leading up to Continue reading “I Finally Admitted the Truth”
As a very introverted, anti-social woman, I have no problem admitting that I don’t enjoy social media. My reasoning is what you’d expect from someone like me. I am easily exhausted by human interaction, anxious, and sometimes prone to irritation. Social media can be a great tool for connecting or re-connecting with people, building a business, and even befriending new people with similar interests. However, social media can also be a war zone. People spew hate-speech, publicly (virtually) crucify people for their mistakes, and cyber-bully the innocent. Today, it is my personal preference to Continue reading “Social Media And Mental Health”
There are people who read my blog and that’s something that I can hardly fathom. Between a lack of confidence and a serious case of impostor syndrome, I never felt that I could create anything that would be of value to anyone else. Despite having so many reasons to believe otherwise, I still struggle to wrap my mind around someone thinking a creation of mine is worth their time.
But this is not a post about my struggles with anxiety and identity. This is simply a post to say thank you. Thank you to everyone who has read even one of my posts. Thank you to those who’ve subscribed to my blog. Thank you to each and every commentor. Thank you to everyone who’s written to me to personally let me know that they enjoy my content. I’ve contemplated giving up this blog so many times and I’m glad I’ve decided to stick around. I look forward to continuing to write and share my little 2 cents on life.
It’s really easy for me to tell someone that I “couldn’t care less” about whatever their problem is- especially when they’ve got a problem with me. It’s even easier for me to brag to other people about how resilient and “thick-skinned” I am. Yet, my anxiety at its core has always been the exact opposite. I’m like a fruit or vegetable with a hard outer shell, but the inside is as mushy as melted ice-cream. Anxiety makes me vulnerable. It whispers into my ear that something is wrong and someone is out to get me. However, in my recent quest to overcome anxiety once and for all, I’ve learned a weapon that can be used against it- the art of not giving a single damn. Continue reading “The Art of Not Giving A Damn”
Very soon, I will have accomplished not one, but two of my life goals. I’ll have obtained a bachelors degree and moved to Japan in just a little more than 5 months. I’m fairly young, so this will be the first time in my life that I’ve actually reached a point like this in my life. It’s strange. I mean, what do you do once you’ve crossed off everything on your bucket list? I gave it some thought and decided that the best thing is to set new goals. Continue reading “My “Post-Bucket List” Bucket list”
For my last post in this series, I’m going to examine my 3rd post on this lovely blog of mine. The topic is one that is really crazy to me because, 2 years later, I’m actually about to have to act on the things that I wrote about. Continue reading “Hindsight : A Look Back At My First 3 Posts (Part 3)”