Confidence

Until recently, I didn’t realize how much of it I am lacking. I like to think of myself as an amazing, valuable woman who is capable of way more than even she realizes. Yet, in the past month, I’ve caught myself saying “why me” when offered great opportunities. In those moments, something else takes over me and I begin to question myself completely. Can I really do that? Do I really know that? Am I really worth all of that?

It’s an awful feeling and I’m not quire sure how to get to the root of the issue. I am somewhat sure that part of it is that I rely to much on myself and not enough on God. So what if I can’t? He can. He can do it for me or even through me. So what’s there to doubt? Am I not following His will? I mean, I may not be perfect, but my heart is set on the will of God and I can not allow pesky self doubt get in the way. Besides, God won’t let self-doubt get in the way! Self doubt can pester me and try to take me out, but it’s no match for my God.

Like any other challenge lately, I’m looking this one in the eyes as I lace up my spiritual boxing gloves. I let these kind of thoughts rule my life for too long. Now, one-by-one I am determined to face them head on.

Moving Forward

This morning, I took some time to write my last entry in my 2017 bullet journal. I wanna just say that bullet journals are AMAZING. I am so glad that I invested in that little notebook for my thoughts. I’ve actually filled up almost every page with my thoughts, ideas, schedules, grocery lists, etc… The entry I wrote this morning was so important and will likely become a reference point for me over the next 12 months. I meditated over just about every other word as I thought about where I am today and where I was this time last year. And when I closed that notebook, I couldn’t help but smile at the idea that I may have this bright future available. It honestly makes me more grateful for every day that I wake up. And speaking of grateful, I also made sure to write out the instructions that I have received from God recently.

Also, today is Christmas and I love it. The idea of a day to celebrate the birth of my savior… Just brings me an unexplainable kind of joy. But is it strange that the next holiday on my mind is Easter aka The Resurrection.

Is it better to be.. “broke”?

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I captured this photo while passing through Shizuoka on a road trip to Kyoto

A year ago, I was going to wait 8 more years to move to Japan. Isn’t that just ridiculous? Well see, there’s a reason. I wanted to have $50,000 before I go and I wanted to obtain this money by joining the military and saving.

While this plan might sound financially solid, it was silly. Continue reading