Little Specks of Brown

My favorite thing to do in the morning is open my blinds and look at the trees outside of my window. One tree has a branch that hangs particularly close to my window, so I tend to look it it’s leaves first. Today, I noticed brownish, yellowish specks and a thought popped into my head… Time waits for no one.

The summer season is approaching a close and autumn is coming right behind it. No matter who was born or who died, no matter who was hurt or who found peace, no matter who found there way or who went deeper into the darkness… time didn’t stop. The leaves on this tree aren’t going to stop and wait for life to get better or worse to change their color and fall to the ground. The earth will keep rotating, its orbit continual, and time will continue to pass.

I, too, need not wait. Pain from my past, lost friendships, loneliness, or even my upcoming graduation are no excuse for me to pause my life, even for a second. I don’t need to wait for the “perfect” time to pursue my goals, get rid of toxic people and things, or to decide to be confident in myself. I have to get used to continuing on, just like to leaves on that tree. Those brown specks tell me that the tree is anticipating the change in season and I took it as a message from God, that I need to do the same. I’m about to enter a new season, whether I’m ready or not, and it’s time to prepare. Not when I feel like the time is right, but right now.

2018 isn’t over yet and it’s not too late to accomplish the things I’d hoped for by the end of the year. And honestly, before I saw the leaves this morning, I’d already come to the conclusion that I needed to forget the idea of this little “life pause” button that I can sit on when I’m not feeling like moving forward. But it’s a lot easier said than done? Don’t you agree? So, I always need a gentle reminder, like browning tree leaves or a stick note that I’ve placed on my bathroom mirror, or even a Pinterest dream-board.

The seasons are going to change soon. Are you ready?

Shouldn’t Everyone Go To College?

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To go or not to go… that is the question… right? As an adult who really wasn’t that interested in going to college as a teen, but still went, I might have a balanced perspective on the matter for those who are contemplating going (or forcing their kids to/not to go). Continue reading →

Waking Up Depressed

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This one’s gonna get personal…


I used to identify as someone who wasn’t a “morning person” because of how difficult it was for me to get out of bed in the morning. I had a ridiculously difficult time getting out of bed. And even once I finally dragged myself out of the bed, I still didn’t feel like myself. 

Continue reading →

Reading goals for 2018

Last year was a phenomenal year for me when it comes to reading. I see so much growth in my knowledge and ability to focus as a result of how much I read last year. I don’t think I’ve read this much since I was in the 6th grade! So, I want to keep it going. Originally, my goal was to read one more book than I did last year, but I think I want to tweak that goal a little bit a lot. My reading goals for this year will be met by reading articles between now and May. If I find this to be effective, then I’ll continue it throughout the year. This doesn’t mean I won’t read any books at all, but I may not read more BOOKS than I read last year (which was 4 or 5 books). Here’s the plan for every week between now and May:

1 NHK News article ( link )

1 Research article ( link / link )

1 Nutrition article ( link / link / link )

3 Pages of my Japanese nutrition book ( link )

For each read, I don’t want to spend more than 1.5 hours at a time reading. I also want to write a short summary for each (in English), record a vlog of myself summarizing, or I will just take notes as I read. This should be fun and a very achievable goal as long as I keep up with it.

I can see the light!

Oh! Oh! Oh!!!!!

I had a little thought pop into my head today. For once, I am on a new path. I’ve finally broken the cycle that I was in…!

Ok, I have to slow down. So, today I took my last difficult exam for the semester (besides finals) and I know I passed it! Now… I don’t know that I passed it with the grade I want, but ultimately, I know that I am going to pass this class. I’m going to pass all of my classes, and I’m actually expecting to remain on the Dean’s List. But… oh where was I going with this…?

Oh! So, I was walking to my car and I was thinking about how long I’ve been doing this college thing. And then it hit me.. I have 3 semesters left. So what if I’ve been doing this for so long. THIS is a point that I’ve never gotten to. I’ve never gotten down to the last 1.5 years of college. I’ve never been able to say, in 1 year I’m moving to Japan. But right now, I can say it. The overwhelming amount of joy that hit me from this made me take a look at myself and I realized that I’m finally moving forward.

This was an amazing realization for me and I’m really proud of myself. I feel like I can actually see the light. I’m so close to being where I want to be.