I haven’t made one of these in a while and I’ve got a few reasons why not:
- I struggle to cook here at my dad’s place because I can’t meal prep here (no fridge space)
- I’ve been looking for alternative solutions to weight loss (and found one) because I hated tracking my foods
So here’s the update: Between stress, prayer (to take my appetite away), “skinny tea”, beach body, and wearing a waist trainer every other day, I just don’t eat much anymore. I probably eat once or twice in a day and only 1 of those meals will be “large”. I mostly drink smoothies (superfood powder mixed with a bolthouse premade smoothie), coffee, and water during the day. When I become the least bit anxious, I completely lose my appetite and I don’t eat anything except fruit sometimes.
Now, I know this sounds unhealthy. Okay, it is unhealthy. However, it’s working in my favor. I needed to hit the reset button on my appetite so I could get a grip on my dietary choices. It’s so much easier now for me to chose to eat nutritious foods because I’m not constantly starving and willing to eat anything. And when I do eat unhealthy, I don’t each much of it. So far, I’ve lost 7lbs and I know I’ll lose more if I keep this up. When I do eat, it’s usually at least 1/2 vegetables.
So that’s that. Hopefully, as I get myself together, I’ll get a better grip on this. But for now, it’s working very well for me.
My favorite thing to do in the morning is open my blinds and look at the trees outside of my window. One tree has a branch that hangs particularly close to my window, so I tend to look it it’s leaves first. Today, I noticed brownish, yellowish specks and a thought popped into my head… Time waits for no one.
The summer season is approaching a close and autumn is coming right behind it. No matter who was born or who died, no matter who was hurt or who found peace, no matter who found there way or who went deeper into the darkness… time didn’t stop. The leaves on this tree aren’t going to stop and wait for life to get better or worse to change their color and fall to the ground. The earth will keep rotating, its orbit continual, and time will continue to pass.
I, too, need not wait. Pain from my past, lost friendships, loneliness, or even my upcoming graduation are no excuse for me to pause my life, even for a second. I don’t need to wait for the “perfect” time to pursue my goals, get rid of toxic people and things, or to decide to be confident in myself. I have to get used to continuing on, just like to leaves on that tree. Those brown specks tell me that the tree is anticipating the change in season and I took it as a message from God, that I need to do the same. I’m about to enter a new season, whether I’m ready or not, and it’s time to prepare. Not when I feel like the time is right, but right now.
2018 isn’t over yet and it’s not too late to accomplish the things I’d hoped for by the end of the year. And honestly, before I saw the leaves this morning, I’d already come to the conclusion that I needed to forget the idea of this little “life pause” button that I can sit on when I’m not feeling like moving forward. But it’s a lot easier said than done? Don’t you agree? So, I always need a gentle reminder, like browning tree leaves or a stick note that I’ve placed on my bathroom mirror, or even a Pinterest dream-board.
The seasons are going to change soon. Are you ready?
To go or not to go… that is the question… right? As an adult who really wasn’t that interested in going to college as a teen, but still went, I might have a balanced perspective on the matter for those who are contemplating going (or forcing their kids to/not to go). Continue reading “Shouldn’t Everyone Go To College?”
It was just three months ago that I sat in my supervisors office with red, swollen, teary eyes. I was irritable, irrational, and just straight up tired of the world. My supervisor sat across from me in attendance of my pity party with a sad look on her face and she asked me if I wanted to continue working at my job. Continue reading “My Only Summer Goal”
I know the title sounds dramatic for a lot of people and I’m not saying that there’s no such thing as a “friend”, but in this post I’d like to discuss my perspective. Continue reading “Friendship is not real”
This one’s gonna get personal…
I used to identify as someone who wasn’t a “morning person” because of how difficult it was for me to get out of bed in the morning. I had a ridiculously difficult time getting out of bed. And even once I finally dragged myself out of the bed, I still didn’t feel like myself.
Continue reading “Waking Up Depressed”
My babies are growing! And apparently, so am I. Continue reading “Growth”